Coming to an End

After reading other’s blog posts and reflecting on what we have talked about during this course, what has stood out to me most are the number of blog posts in which people talk about staying true to their values and realizing that they should be respected in a relationship and should respect others in a relationship. I think that this course has really shown all of us that society is changing, and we have been made aware of the presence of the “hookup” culture on college campuses and in the professional world. I have really learned a lot from reading other’s posts and seeing their viewpoints. It is interesting to see other’s opinions on topics that effect (or will affect) all of us as we grow up.

After reading the article about Lent and what it means, and about how Holy Saturday marks the end of a waiting period and should be a time of thought and further preparation, I have decided to make this Holy Saturday especially meaningful. This year, Lent has coincided with the never-ending wait for the end of the college process. I have never had such difficulty waiting,, and this Lent has been very unique for me. I have tried to make an effort not to complain as much, and have tried to endure the waiting period without making a big deal. This Holy Saturday, I hope to set aside time to reflect on this Lent and on my relationship with God, and to spend significant time consciously contemplating my relationship with God and all that he has blessed me with this Lent and throughout the entire college process. Even if I am rejected from a college, there is so much in my life to be thankful for and I have God to thank for all of it.

As I move on to new stages of my life (college, marriage, etc,), I hope to expand on my relationship with God and what I have learned in this course. I am planning on setting aside more time to appreciate life’s moments, rather than let them pass by without a second thought. Life is precious, and each moment should be lived to the fullest; God should be part of each of these moments, and it is my mission to make Him a larger part of my life.

Religious Freedom

The articles and statements from the USCCB and America Magazine regarding birth control and the HHS mandate have given me great insight into the Catholic Church’s views on contraception and have shown me the lengths the Church will go to in order to protect its rights and values. I think it is very interesting that this event is occurring while we are discussing this issue in class. I think it is important that the Church attempts to intersect with politics when issues arise that affect the Church as an institution and its congregation. The Catholic Church has a right to voice its opinion and defend its views and teachings. In this case, the Church has a right to object to the HHS mandate and attempt to change its effects and conditions. My family has been very aware of this issue both in politics and within the Church. Outside of class, I have learned the specifics of the mandate and have seen the evolution of the Church’ s fight to change the mandate. I have also seen how this mandate has affected the presidential race (especially among Republican presidential candidates.) Although I might not fully agree with the Church’s views concerning birth control, I believe that the Church is fully justified in taking issue with this mandate and I believe that the Church ahs a right to protect its principles and moral values. Only time will tell how successful the mandate will be; it will be interesting to see what steps the Church takes in the future.

Love is the love of being loving

I really agreed with a lot that was said in the article “Love is the love of being loving.” Even though I was unfamiliar with the movie reference, I felt that the way Norm and Marge genuinely cared about each other and wanted to know how each other’s days had been showed their love. Norm’s excitement at Marge’s pregnancy was also a testament to how he felt about her. I also liked how the actress Ruby Dee stated that love means that she and Ossie Davis were in everything together, no matter what the issue or what stage in life it occurred. I agree with the statement that falling in love is the easy part, and learning to love (the most important part), is the most difficult and requires the most effort.

Domestic Church

Ever since an early age, my parents have instilled in my siblings and I a deep connection with God and a strong faith. Faith is very important to my family. However, this does not simply mean that we attend Church every Sunday and are involved in our Parish. My parents have shown me love, trust, and forgiveness, and in many ways our family has been the most “intimate church”. My parents serve as great examples of how wonderful a marriage can be and have always adhered to their morals and values.

Based on the clips of Parenthood we viewed in class, I realize that there are pros/and cons of the changing structure of and composition of marriage and family. When families are broken apart by divorce or family issues, problems in other areas can ensue. Children can feel unwanted and ignored and veer off course socially and academically, and more anger and harsh feelings can arise. In addition, couples who have children together and are not married have a difficult time staying together (even if it is for the sake of their child.) This was evident with Crosby and his ex. However, some characters in the show have happy marriages and relationships and work together to resolve their issues and hardships.

I too would someday like to establish a “domestic church”, as my family has done for me. I believe that beginning your faith at home helps not only to strengthen family bonds but also helps to strengthen one’s relationship with God and help it form more deeply and fully.

Dating and Marriage

After reading these articles, I feel that my intentions in a relationship are to be with someone who I respect as much as they respect me. I feel that a serious relationship should be built upon true friendship and a deep understanding of another person. There should be no fear of open communication, and I would hope that I would want to sacrifice anything if it meant being with this person. Although these intentions may at first seem slightly unrealistic, I feel that with the proper effort and consideration put into a relationship, it can form into the exact kind of friendship I intend it to be. I am looking for someone who shares many of my interests but also exposes me to new things I might not have been aware of or previously interested in. I think that not knowing everything about a person makes a relationship exciting and healthy.

I feel that my intentions, although not completely modern, do reflect Christian values and ideals. I hope to fully know someone before making a commitment as serious and long lasting as marriage, and I hope that God will help me find this person and make the right choices to find them in my life.

Dating: What's the point?

After reading Chapter 5 and thinking about my views concerning dating, I disagree with the “anti-daters” who argue that dating on our current social context is essentially “practice for divorce”. While I understand the point anti-daters are trying to make about the importance of relationships, I feel that dating serves as a way to discover what type of person you would like to spend the rest of your life with. Moreover, finding out what type of people you are compatible with is crucial, and I feel that dating serves as a great preparation for marriage and can be the key to keeping a marriage together. I agree with Donna Freitas and Jason King’s views that we learn a great deal from those whom we date, even if the relationship eventually breaks up. Dating teaches you how to care for another person and how to attend to the needs of others, rather than solely your own. I feel that Freitas and King’s observations about dating are true in the lives of young people today. I do not think that most of my friends are considering marriage quite yet, but I feel that the relationships they have now are in many ways preparing them for a long lasting relationship with the one they will end up marrying.

Having said this, I feel that the “Hook-Up” culture present on college campuses today is preparing people for divorce rather than marriage. When people form a relationship solely based on sex and infatuation, a good foundation for a lasting relationship cannot be built. Relationships should be deeper than “Hooking-up”; otherwise, one will not know what it is to commit to an actual relationship and remain faithful to one person.

Its that time of year again...

For me, Lent has always meant the beginning of preparation for Easter, and, of course, the dreaded “food fasting” and giving up unhealthy things. As I thought about how I have spent Lent throughout my life, I realized that I have not always taken Lent seriously or taken the time to appreciate the season. This year, I hope to observe Lent more strictly and truly contemplate the meaning of this time. In the past, I have given up chocolate and soda and refrained from eating meat on Fridays, but I do not feel that I have always considered why I was doing these things. In addition, I realized that I have always thought about “giving up” things for Lent, rather than doing something extra for Lent or “adding something”. Lent is a time for us to look at ourselves and realize that we are sinners and must turn to God for help; Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice for us, and we must work to be better people.

Although I do plan on giving up desserts this Lent, I think that I will view Lent from a different standpoint. In addition to giving something up, I am going to make a conscious effort to attend St. Francis Inn with more regularity, even though I might have to change my schedule. I also plan on helping my mom with my little brother more this season. She needs all the help she can get, and I feel that it would be good for me to spend more time with him. I hope that this Lent will be a transformative time for me, and that I come to realize Lent’s purpose more fully.

What is Love?

Love is a theme that permeates almost every song written today. Songs about crushes, breakups and everlasting love can be heard on almost every radio station. But, to quote Haddaway, “what is love?” What is it about this emotion or connection that makes love so celebrated? Different artists have had different interpretations of love and its meaning in their lives. I have highlighted a few that I found most meaningful.

In her timeless classic “At Last”, Etta James sings,

“At last my love has come along, my lonely days are over, and life is like a song.”

I think this is a beautiful depiction of love and its powerful effect. These lyrics portray unending happiness, deep friendship, and a feeling of completion. Ideally, I think that everyone should feel this way when they find the person they are meant to be with. Your spouse should be someone who makes you feel like you are never alone, and life should be better when you are together.

I also feel that Whitney Houston portrays an important aspect of love in her song, “I Will Always Love You”. I like her lyrics,

“I hope life treats you kind, and I hope you have all you've dreamed of, and I wish to you, joy and happiness, but above all this, I wish you love.

I believe that when you love someone, you should be as concerned (if not more concerned) about his or her happiness and well being as you are about yourself. Love is more than infatuation and romantic gestures; it is a deep friendship that should withstand difficult times. Both people in the relationship should make a conscious effort to make the other happy. Sara Bareilles’ song “Love Song” also discusses the fact that a relationship should not be one sided; both people need to work to keep their friendship alive.

I feel that Beyoncé’s song “Dangerously In Love” also makes a good observation about love. I feel that parts of love can be summarized by the lyrics,

“My happiest moments weren't complete 
if you weren't by my side.”

I believe that when you find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, life should always seem better when they are around. I feel that your spouse should “complete you” in a sense. I hope to find someone who compliments my personality, and who makes everything more fun and enjoyable.

I have always been a firm believer that your spouse should make life seem complete and should be your “soul-mate”. However, I am not under the impression that there is only one person out there for everyone. Life is unpredictable, and you might end up falling in love with someone who you never would have pictured yourself with. I feel that your spouse should be your soul mate, but I think it is naive to be searching for your soul mate and become obsessed with the idea of finding “the one”. I agree with many points made in the Busted Halo article. Finding Mr. Perfect or Ms. Perfect might be an impossible task and leave you feeling dejected and disappointed.